at your service: Proprietors Ellen Tackowiak and Jeff Palmer are surrounded by some of the treasures in their Gladstone shop.

Along with rare tiger-maple wood furnishings, Gladstone Country House’s inventory features goods from small-scale manufacturers that will tailor designs to the customer’s needs.

Step into the charming butter-yellow building that is Gladstone Country House and you are sure to be inspired by Jeff Palmer and Ellen Tackowiak. The husband-and-wife duo are the owners of the store, which specializes in American-made furniture.

Tackowiak opened the shop in 2000, near Gladstone’s town center, following in her father’s footsteps—he owned the now-defunct Chatham House—and planned to sell rare tiger-maple wood furniture exclusively. “You can’t grow tiger maple on purpose,” Palmer says. “It just happens at random in less than 1 percent of maple trees. You don’t know it until the wood gets to the lumber mill and you start cutting it and see this ripple in the grain structure.”

The store “just kind of grew from there,” Tackowiak says. In addition to the extensive tiger-maple collection, Gladstone Country House now carries other wood furniture, oriental lamps—a collection of at least 150 at one time, Palmer says—upholstered chairs and sofas, wall décor and accessories. All of the furniture, which the couple characterizes as classic and slightly transitional, is solid wood, with no veneers. “That sets us apart from a lot of other stores right now,” he says. “Staying small lets us keep that focus.”

The couple selects their inventory from small-scale manufacturers. “We’re up to nine different makers just of tiger-maple furniture alone,” Palmer says. “Some of them are just one-man operations. Our biggest [supplier of wood furniture] is maybe 15 to 20 people. I can call up and talk directly to the owner or his daughter.” This familiarity with the craftsmen allows Palmer and Tackowiak to offer customizable furniture. “If you want this table two inches shorter, they’ll make it two inches shorter—you’re not going to get that at most other places,” Palmer says.

Related posts:

1. Fun House Furnishings & Design
2. Lloyd’s Furniture
3. Christmas Decorating at the White House

Polished Pups: The Morris Animal Inn offers numerous health and beauty treatments for your dog, including moisturizing paw soaks (above) and canine bubble baths.

With a number of luxury pet resorts, day-care centers and spas sprouting up around the Garden State, Jersey pooches can be just as pampered as their owners.

“In the winter, surfaces are so cold because of ice and snow. Dogs’ paws can get really brittle just like our nails,” explains Lori Zimmerman, owner of Pups@Play, a doggy day-care center that also offers grooming, training, holistic wellness and vacation care services (973-740-8500; pupsdaycare.com) in Livingston. Treat Fido to one of its paw balm treatments (on sale through March for $5). This moisturizing treatment soothes dry and cracked paws, and “it smells really good,” Zimmerman adds.

“When you get those chapped hands and dry skin, your dog is experiencing the same,” says Debora Montgomery, marketing manager for the Morris Animal Inn (973-539-0377; morrisanimalinn.com). The Morristown pet resort, which offers day care, boarding, grooming and spa services for dogs and cats, is offering a canine salon experience for $19.95 that includes a facial scrub, bubble bath and more. “With just one application, this treatment conditions your dog’s skin and leaves it smelling great,” she says.

Exercise is an essential part of your pup’s beauty and wellness routine, but the winter chill keeps most of us indoors. “You don’t want to go out and play ball, so your dog is cooped up in the house and has a lot of energy,” says Shelly Leibowitz, co-owner of Green Leaf Pet Resort & Hotel (732-845-3787; greenleafpetresort.com) in Millstone.

“Swimming is the perfect way for your dog to have fun and get fit at the same time,” he says. The pet destination, which offers pickup and delivery services to its day-care, training, boarding and grooming facility, recently installed a 20- by 40-foot salt-based swimming pool in which canines can dive, retrieve and swim laps. Sounds doggone delightful.

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Like a lot of successful people, Patti Stanger knew at a young age what she wanted to be—a matchmaker. In fact, one can trace Stanger’s career back to grade school, when she would forge her friends’ signatures on Valentine’s Day cards for their potential prince charmings.

Matchmaking is something she was born to do, the star and producer of TV’s The Millionaire Matchmaker, said during a recent telephone interview from Los Angeles. Both her mother, who now lives in Florida but grew up in South Orange before moving to Short Hills, and her grandmother, a Newark native, were matchmakers.

“They didn’t do it for money, but that’s what they were. They were very active in the community,” says the 50-year-old Stanger, who talked with Park Place at the start of a mid-winter’s day of new-show pitching; in addition to The Millionaire Matchmaker on Bravo, Stanger has her sights set on producing three other love- and romance-related reality TV series, all of which she is shopping to networks, and none of which she can yet discuss in detail.

“My grandmother actually found my mother her husbands both times she was married. It left an impression,” says Stanger. Short Hills schools, too, were rife with chances to play cupid, she says. “I remember at Millburn Junior High, we were so bored—boys wouldn’t even approach girls. We’d go to all these bar mitzvahs, and the boys didn’t have the chutzpah to ask a girl to dance. They’d all stand in the corner.” Stanger, ever the ringleader, took matters into her own hands. “We decided we were going to go to a dance at the local Catholic school, Christ Church, one night. The gentile boys were super-hot.” But the scenario there was the same as at Millburn Junior High: clumps of boys, disappointed girls. “So the priest came up to me and said, ‘You need to get this thing started,’” Stanger recalls. And she did.

The rest is history, says the star whose reputation for a certain boldness—she’s not above telling potential matches for her millionaire clients they need to lose weight or change their hair color—is as solid as her track record for leading countless couples to the altar.

For those who have yet to witness Stanger chastise a lonely dot.com millionaire for breaking her two-drink maximum rule while on a date or her primetime scrutiny of a lineup of potential “millionairesses,” there are some personal details that need filling in.  Stanger, who lived in Short Hills until she was 21, dated a boy “a town away in Springfield who taught me how to drive” while attending Millburn High, but eventually reached the conclusion that “dating was just weird in Millburn.”

She earned a degree in fine arts from the University of Miami in 1983 and began a career that touched down, briefly, in fashion. But “I was always fixing people up,” says Stanger, who has never married. (In 2010, she ended a six-year relationship, but says she’s still sure she’ll find Mr. Right.) Throughout all that romance trafficking, including her 1990s stint as marketing director at Great Expectations, the country’s oldest and largest dating service, she noticed that not all dating demographics were created equal: well-heeled clients needed extra help, she says. Not only did they lack the time to find dates, but they felt the need for added discretion when being set up.

So in 2000, she founded the Los Angeles-based matchmaking service, Millionaire’s Club International, which, in addition to being the launchpad for one of the most successful shows in Bravo’s lineup—The Millionaire Matchmaker’s sixth season begins shooting in March-—is still flourishing. Even in this economy. “There’s less volume now in millionaires. We get fewer of them, but the ones we do get have more money,” Stanger says. And they still join the club looking for love from all over the country, though most of the couples set up on the show by Stanger and her on-air protégés, real-life couple Rachel Federoff and Destin Jude Pfaff, are from Southern California.

Which is not entirely the way she would like it. Stanger often refers to herself as her clients’ fairy godmother. But if she were her own fairy godmother, she would transplant more East Coast types to the Millionaire’s Club’s West Coast headquarters, says Stanger, who returns to New Jersey every year to visit cousins in South Orange and West Orange and shop at the Mall at Short Hills. (“No taxes—it’s great,” she says.)

“I love East Coast people—people from New Jersey, New York and Pennsylvania. Their level of integrity is much stronger,” she says. “There’s a definite coastal thing, and people from New Jersey and the whole surrounding area are very, very honest. I wish they’d move to California.”

Stanger’s own ingrained East Coast honesty leads to admissions: she never expected to be a TV personality, she says. (“I’m more of a screenwriter by nature—I was like ‘Huh?’ when they wanted me to be on the show.”) It also has led to controversial off-the-cuff comments—she took a media drubbing in 2011 for saying that “Jewish men lie,” and that gay men have monogamy issues during an interview on the Bravo show Watch What Happens Live.  She later apologized for both comments on Twitter.

But that very public sensitivity lesson has not stopped Stanger from telling it like it is. Even when she’s relaying recollections of her formative years to a local magazine. “We used to call Short Hills ‘Short Thrills,’” she says. And “I heard that somebody once called Short Hills the most boring town in America.”

Stanger’s respect for her hometown, and for her gay and Jewish clients, is there, though. She just forgets to make it front-and-center sometimes.

“Millburn High is the number-one school in the country,” Stanger adds, in a way that doesn’t suggest backpedaling, just honest reflection. “A lot of prominent people come from that area—movie stars, politicians. There’s something about it that, when you stay there, it builds your character. I’m glad I grew up there.”

Patti Stanger’s Dating Tips For New Jersey Women:

1. “The biggest problem with dating in New Jersey is that no one gets out of the house. In the summer it’s easier—you go to the swim club or whatever. But you have to make an effort to get out and do things in the winter, too. Go somewhere. Anywhere.”
2. “You need to find some singles spots. It’s much easier in New York. New Jersey is coming around, I think, but somebody needs to take the initiative and open more places for single people to hang out in New Jersey.”
3. “Pay it forward. If you want to get dates, you have to help your friends get dates. Start fixing people up and you’ll end up fixing yourself up.”
4. “Get out of your zip code. It’s OK to date a New Yorker. There are plenty of opportunities to go places in that area. Don’t stay in your hometown.”
5. “Ask me questions: It’s what I do. I’m on Twitter at @PattiStanger. And I do answer!”

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Makeup artist Jenine perfectly lines her lips; Manicurist Brunilda applies gel-color to her fingertips. (With the new OPI gel-color system, nails cure in an ultraviolet light machine and are bone-dry in just 30 seconds.)

When I first laid eyes on Lisa Brennan of Morris Plains, I thought, “YES!  She is perfect!” Her big blue eyes, great skin and teeth, and effervescent personality made the 42-year-old veterinarian an easy choice for a Park Place makeover.

Brennan says she has put her personal sense of style (and her career) on hold for the last five years to raise her two young sons. “I wake up in the morning, get the kids ready for school, grab a slice of peanut-butter toast on my way out the door and sometimes forget to comb my hair,” she says. But this outdoorsy ski buff admits she hasn’t given much thought to hair, makeup or fashion. “Until now, I have never worn makeup, not even on my wedding day, so I have no idea what I’ll look like with mascara and lip color.”

After picking myself up off the floor, I contacted our friends at DePasquale The Spa (depasqualethespa.com) in Morris Plains, and the transformation began. Manager Stacey Catalogna assembled a stalwart makeover team that optimized Brennan’s best features to give her a glamorous new look.

Wardrobe, from Top This boutique in Morristown (shoptopthis.com), accented Brennan’s size-2 figure; it previously had been concealed by fleece pullovers and loose jeans. Then, Duet, the luxury resale aficionados in Livingston (dueteveryday.com), polished-off the look with gorgeous designer jewelry and a stunning handbag.

Lisa Brennan loves her sparkling new appearance—even her parents didn’t recognize her at first. This sexy veterinarian is now the cat’s meow!

Lisa Brennan’s makeover magic included highlights, easy-care hairstyle, long-lasting gel-color manicure, eyebrow shaping and natural-looking makeup, courtesy of DePasquale The Spa in Morris Plains.

Brennan’s new wardrobe, from Top This boutique in Morristown, includes a curve-hugging black knit top by Three Dot, a BCBG Max Azria power mini skirt and a reversible faux fur vest by Roam. Her monochromatic look is pulled together with opaque tights and accented with cherry-red suede pumps by Steve Madden—perfect for Valentine’s Day fun.

Elegant but simple jewelry and a super-chic Gucci Babouska leather handbag with adorable heart charm hail from Duet in Livingston. Brennan’s bling includes a Van Cleef & Arpels black onyx and 18K Alhambra Clover necklace, Robert Lee Morris 18K earrings, Agas Tamar stone and 24K bracelet and a Louis Vuitton Serrure Pampilles 18K and leather bracelet.

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1. Makeovers for Real Women
2. Getting to Know Derek Lam
3. 2009 Holiday Gift Guide

]]> http://www.parkplacemag.com/02/2012/real-makeovers-for-real-women/feed/ 0 http://www.parkplacemag.com/02/2012/too-tired-to-tango/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=too-tired-to-tango http://www.parkplacemag.com/02/2012/too-tired-to-tango/#comments Wed, 01 Feb 2012 00:28:07 +0000 Susan Brierly http://www.parkplacemag.com/?p=5762

Surviving with Style

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It’s Valentine’s Day, touted as the most romantic, sensual day of the year. But if you’re feeling less than frisky, don’t fret—you might just be stressed out, not turned off. “Woman are generally more stressed than men because women live multidimensional lives and expect themselves to excel at everything—as mothers, wives, employees, volunteers, good daughters and good friends,” says Mary Lou Quinlan, author, television personality and CEO of New York-based marketing agency, Just Ask a Woman (justaskawoman.com).

Over the years, Quinlan’s organization has interviewed women on an array of topics. Her books on stress, Time Off for Good Behavior and What She’s Not Telling You, lay it all on the line.

“Women like to share their stress and get relief from talking to other women. A group of men can play golf for five hours without sharing personal information,” Quinlan says. “But if a group of women spends five hours together, they will have discussed all the stressors in their lives because they benefit from common ground.

“As women, we tend to think about everyone else all the time. And we inject this fervor into everything we do,” says Quinlan. “My organization has interviewed thousands of women over the last 12 years, and we have concluded that most women try to pack 38 hours of activity into a 24-hour day. One wife and mother confided that she actually appreciated her bout with strep throat because she spent two days in bed, and those turned out to be the two most relaxing days of her year.”

Quinlan adds that women have the smarts to deal with many challenges. But, she says, “Females seldom put themselves first, and are often afraid to ask their doctors the hard questions. Each woman needs to be an advocate for herself.”

This notion of self-advocacy applies to all areas of female health, including sexual wellness and the need for intimacy.

“As physicians, we were taught the Masters and Johnson model: desire, arousal, orgasm, cigarettes—and that’s great for the first 18 months of a relationship, but then desire naturally dwindles,” says Dr. Judith Hersh, OB/GYN, cofounder of Central Jersey Women’s Health Associates and medical director of the New Jersey Center for Sexual Wellness in Bedminster (908-532-0144; njsexualwellness.com). “Today, in counseling patients, I use the Basson model, which is more circular—being open to an advance, sex play, desire, satisfaction and intimacy.

“For women, sex isn’t always top of mind, so put a reminder in your iPhone or it might not happen,” she says. “Generally speaking, if you’re comfortable in your relationship, you are likely to be open to an advance. So just plan it and the desire will come. As for men, I always say, ‘Foreplay is taking out the garbage and putting the kids to bed so your wife can prepare for intimacy.’”

Experts agree that, as most couples get older, they still want to be intimate and sexual, but need creative ideas to help boost “wild monogamy” in the bedroom.

“You might adore macaroni and cheese, but you wouldn’t serve it every night, right?” says Hersh. “It’s good to spice up the menu now and then.”

Hersh and her colleague, sexuality educator Dr. Melanie Davis, sometimes recommend new techniques or novelty devices to patients. “Over-the-counter arousal enhancers or prescription medications might also be appropriate, and some patients are helped by a trained sex therapist,” says Hersh. “In fact, some suddenly liberated patients have actually skipped out of our office because they no longer feel shame or embarrassment.”

Physicians agree that many patients are simply too shy to ask delicate questions. And, when they do get up the nerve, they usually blurt out their concern at the end of their medical exam, as the doctor reaches for the doorknob. But experts say that these important health issues deserve more than a brief exchange at the conclusion of an appointment.

“Some women struggle with this. It’s not unusual for my patients to say, ‘I’m not into sex—what’s wrong with me?,’” says Dr. Joseph Ramieri, chair of the department of OB/GYN and Women’s Health, and attending physician at Atlantic Health System’s Morristown and Overlook medical centers.

“I truly believe that many issues in the bedroom are related to body image for both women and men. But sometimes women lose interest in sex because it’s painful and not satisfying, so it becomes a turnoff,” Ramieri explains.

“The most common complaint I hear from women over 50 is that they don’t enjoy sex anymore because it has become uncomfortable. This is a valid concern because, as hormone levels change, the circumference of the vagina actually shrinks in caliber,” he says.

“However, even past menopause, there are ways to make sex comfortable and satisfying, thanks to new low-dose hormonal creams and oral medications that can actually revitalize vaginal walls that begin to thin during perimenopause,” Ramieri notes.

“I can say with certainty that it’s not unusual for 60- and 65-year-old women with new men in their lives to resume sexual activity and love it, providing they are comfortable physiologically.

“Once physiological issues are handled, if there still is no desire, I recommend varying the predictable patterns of intimacy, and this might include trying some of the products on the market that can help put romance and fun back in the bedroom,” Ramieri adds.

The experts seem to agree that varying your moves under the sheets can be a pleasurable and healthy activity—so there’s no reason to sit on the sidelines anymore, ladies. Grab your partner and enjoy the dance.

Healthy Girls Have Better Sex

Take good care of yourself to look and feel your best. Other benefits will follow.

If you’re stressed out, your body could be trying to save energy—rather than seek pleasure—because it is depleted of the essential building blocks required to regulate estrogen and testosterone for a healthy sex drive. Take better care of yourself. Relax, exercise, read, chat with a friend, or enjoy a warm bubble bath.

Throughout perimenopause and menopause, female hormones become imbalanced. It’s easy to turn up your nose at the thought of sex when you’re hot flashing, dealing with moodiness and struggling with weight gain. Have a chat with your physician.

If you’re taking meds, they could be affecting your libido. Make a list of everything in your medicine cabinet and ask your doctor or pharmacist if your antidepressants, birth control pills or high-blood-pressure meds could be affecting your sex drive.

To feel healthy and amorous, it’s important to maintain good nutrition. Resist junk food, eat more fresh fruit and veggies and ask your doctor about vitamin supplements. But don’t starve yourself.

Communication is a big part of any relationship. If problems at home or work are making you angry or frustrated, open your heart and mind, talk it out and relieve your stress. Visit a counselor if you need help getting started.

If you and your partner have the urge, but your schedules just don’t jibe, trade off a Saturday night kids’ sleepover with another couple so that you are always assured of a little weekend romance time. Lots of people are in the same boat, so you might be surprised how easy it is to enlist help. And your youngsters will thank you for the sleepover!

Although your exterior may look 10 years younger, thanks to the wonders of Botox, injectables and plastic surgery, your interior still exhibits all the signs of aging including eventual thinning and drying of the vaginal membranes. Don’t be shy—ask your doctor about lubricants and low-dose hormonal creams and medications and reclaim your sexuality.

 

Shaking It up in the Boudoir

If you’re feeling too tired to tango, grab the one you love and get back in step!

Body image plays a big role in sexuality. “Dim the lights, play romantic music, put on something lacy and you’ll feel sexier and more confident,” says Randee Tucker, co-owner of Bardot Lingerie in Millburn (973-379-7474; bardotlingerienj.com). “We always encourage our clients to venture out of their comfort zone by wearing something to surprise and delight their partner.”

The Dain Shoppe in Morristown (973-539-7586; dainshoppe.com) is known as a tried-and-true resource for undergarments and dainty lingerie. But take a peek in Linda’s Closet, a tiny display area off the main sales floor, and you might be surprised to find boudoir heels as well as goodies embellished with feathers and some that require AA batteries. “We do a lot of business out of that little closet,” says owner Cathy Earnhardt. “Women across the state are spreading the word.”

Hot on the market right now are topical arousal oils. One such product, made in the Garden State by Semprae Laboratories, is Zestra (zestra.com), a hormone-free botanical formula. Available over the counter, it claims to “work effortlessly and within minutes by heightening sensitivity to touch for deep, pleasurable sensations, sexual satisfation and fulfillment.”  (In an effort to provide more information to our readers, Park Place editors might have to roll up our sleeves and do some field research on this product.)

Judy Gregorek of Toms River is a “sexpert” for Passion Parties (732-998-1452), a burgeoning business that hosts “ladies night in” home parties. “We help women discover their inner passion diva and we are a discreet resource for lotions, potions and things in motion,” Gregorek says.

After cocktails are served and products are ogled, each guest is invited to bring her checkbook into a private room to place an order—or not.  “Some women leave the party without purchasing anything. But they call me later, after they’ve thought about it, and when they’re ready to take something home,” Gregorek adds. Passion Parties then ships merchandise to clients in plain brown wrappers one week later. No, this is definitely not a Tupperware party, girls.

Related posts:

1. Surviving with Style

]]> http://www.parkplacemag.com/02/2012/too-tired-to-tango/feed/ 0 http://www.parkplacemag.com/02/2012/on-the-market-5/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=on-the-market-5 http://www.parkplacemag.com/02/2012/on-the-market-5/#comments Wed, 01 Feb 2012 00:28:07 +0000 Deborah Carter http://www.parkplacemag.com/?p=5754

On the Market

On the Market…

On the Market…

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Ocean Kelp, the latest addition to the 4 Elements of the Perfect Shave line, is infused with aromatic essential oils and natural, sea-kelp extract to hydrate and soften; $100 at Saks Fifth Avenue in Short Hills, or theartofshaving.com.

Uncover your softer side with glycolic-acid retexturizing pads by Cane + Austin to exfoliate your entire body; $70 at SPACE.NK. apothecary in Short Hills, or caneandaustin.com.

Freshen your complexion with Burberry’s Light Glow. Blossom blush (shown) and Tangerine blush will give your cheeks a youthful radiance; $42 at Nordstrom in Short Hills.

Tint & Shine, from makeup artist Dimitri James’s Skinn Cosmetics line, offers long-lasting color and shine in versatile everyday shades: soft burgundy Villa Rosa, and bright fuchsia Ciao Bella; $18 at skinn.com.

Frame your eyes with Quickliner pencils by Clinique. Available in six vibrant shades that deliver a liquid-like look that lasts 12 hours; $22 at Century 21 in Morristown.

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Makes 20

Ingredients:

20 Fingerling potatoes
1/4 cup crème fraîche
1 ounce caviar, black
half bunch chives, snipped
Salt and pepper, to taste

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.

Cut fingerling potatoes into 3/4-inch wheels. Using a small melon baller, make a small round scoop on one side of flat edge (preferably the wider edge).

Toss potatoes in olive oil, and bake potato cups upside down until golden brown.

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Ingredients:

3 ounces St-Germain

3 ounces brut champagne

Lemon twist, half strawberry or raspberries,
for garnish

Pour St-Germain into a chilled fluted glass and top with champagne; stir lightly. Add garnish of choice

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Jeanne Westervelt Rice

If you want to leverage the power of writing for personal growth, creative expression or professional development, Jeanne Westervelt Rice suggests you pick up a pen.

Rice, who resides in Mendham with her husband and two sons, recently launched My Journal Coach (973-543-2497; myjournalcoach.com), a business that helps participants experience positive action through self-truth and awareness.

“Our individual coaching sessions, thematic workshops and customized corporate programs help people gain a deeper understanding of their true nature so they can operate from a place of authenticity and make a positive impact on the world around them,” says Rice, a certified journaling facilitator. With 25 years of corporate communication under her belt, she has coached hundreds of Fortune 500 executives in public speaking and business writing skills.

“You don’t need to be a business person or even a writer to benefit from our workshops because you already are a writer, just as much as you are a speaker,” says Rice, who has a master’s degree in journalism and is a lifelong journaler. “Every one of us has his or her own natural voice and style.”

Workshop participants are provided notebooks in which to capture thoughts and feelings that emerge through gently guided writing exercises. Participants are invited to share their writing or reflections within the safe and confidential environment of the group if they wish, but are never expected to share or read aloud.

“My goal is to help participants gain clarity from their inner wisdom by tapping into deeply stored feelings and knowledge. Journaling can be an absolutely joyous experience,” says Rice.

The next reflective writing workshop begins on February 21 and meets three consecutive Tuesday evenings in Mendham.

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Green turtleneck by Splendid, $52, dip-dyed sweater in gold, $128, and orange cable-knit skirt, $98, both by Sparrow, all at Anthropologie in Edgewater; long, 14K link chain with charms by Jennifer Fisher, $6,900 at jenniferfisherjewelry.com.

Aiko winter-white sweater, $230, leather shorts by Haute Hippie, $395, both at Neiman Marcus in Short Hills; opaque shimmer tights, $15 at American Apparel in Hoboken; Frye Harlow Campus bootie, $248 at thefryecompany.com; feather earrings, $5.80 at Forever 21 in Cherry Hill; pyramid ring by Ted Rossi, $85 at tedrossi.com.

Ribbed turtleneck by Vince, $210, puffer vest by Moncler, $450, and silk color-blocked Derek Lam pants, $335, all at Neiman Marcus in Short Hills.

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The decor of the Strip House gives a wink and a nod to the double entendre of its name. But make no mistake, this is a steak house that will satisfy serious carnivores.

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The moment I opened my invitation to the Derek Lam fashion show fundraiser at Neiman Marcus Short Hills, I put the date on my calendar in pen. Obviously, I’m a big fan of this international designer.

The event, which featured Lam’s Spring 2012 collection, benefited Opportunity Project (opportunityproject.org), a Millburn-based organization that supports New Jersey residents with brain injuries. During the runway show, Lam announced that he will be designing a special T-shirt, debuting in March, to raise funds for brain-injury awareness.

Originally from San Francisco, this Parsons School of Design graduate began his fashion career in 1990. After working for many years as a designer at Michael Kors, he started his own label in 2003. In 2006, the Derek Lam collection expanded to include handbags, quickly followed by shoes and eyewear. Today, he is internationally known for designing clothes that are luxurious and feminine, yet straightforward and wearable.

“I always consider what will work for women at this moment, and to me this moment is about luxury without formality. Even at their most feminine, my clothes are not precious or staid,” he says.

Deeply engaged in creative dialogue with the worlds of art and architecture, Lam told me that his Spring 2012 collection was influenced by the clean lines evident in the architecture of his native California.

Guests at the Neiman Marcus Short Hills fashion show were delighted to see crisp A-lines, textured honeycomb and ribbed sweaters, tailored leather jackets, python pumps and bold prints (inspired by vintage placemats), all executed in a bright palette of coral, yellow, marine blue, peppermint, black and white.

Visit dereklam.com for a runway clip of this fabulously fresh spring collection.

Reinventing Your Style

 “Out with the old, in with the new” is my motto in 2012. I’m sprucing up what I have, getting rid of what I don’t like, and bringing in only what I need.

Here are my top tips for reinventing yourself:

• Trust a new hair stylist to have his way with your locks. If you’re curly, try straight. If you’re brunette, try red. (I went with a shorter, straighter style.) If you’re not so brave, visit thehairstyler.com to “try on” lots of different coifs.
• Toss your expired makeup products and reevaluate your color palette each season. Have you discovered Chantecaille (chantecaille.com) natural skincare and makeup? I love the Les Macarons Face Palette with liner, lip gloss, and eye and cheek color. (Don’t miss my one-on-one interview with Olivia Chantecaille next issue!)
• Update your look by shopping your own closet. Invest an hour mixing and matching all the tops, bottoms, accessories, jewelry and shoes you already own. (You’ll be surprised how much you can do with all the stuff you’ve squirreled away over the years!)
• Keep only what you love. Send everything else to a consignment shop. Then add a few classic, as well as trendy, pieces to your closet–—cashmere turtlenecks, pencil skirts, tailored jackets, skinny jeans and platform shoes.
• Repair all those loose buttons and saggy hems, and ask the amazing Rago Brothers in Morristown (ragobrothers.com) to resole your favorite pumps and boots—they’ll be good as new!
• Start reinventing yourself and you’ll be inspired to join a gym (and actually go there), improve your nutrition, redecorate the house, finally schedule that mammogram, balance your checkbook, work on your tennis game…yeah, it’s going to be a good year.

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Beverly Hills, a mecca for world-class shopping, glistens by night.

New on the Scene: Wood and Vine in Hollywood is known for its extensive wine list and inventive menu.

Whether you lounge inside one of the Roosevelt Hotel’s luxe suites or relax at its roof bar, this is definitely the way to unwind during a romantic Hollywood getaway. As the locals say, “Hollywood is a state of mind, rather than a place.”

31 Bits jewelry is huge in L.A.

Beverly Hills, a mecca for world-class shopping, glistens by night.

Whether you explore classic celebrity haunts, iconic shops or top-drawer restaurants, clubs and hotels, the Los Angeles communities of Beverly Hills and Hollywood offer a level of excitement and elegance that will satisfy even the hard to impress. Indulge in some well-deserved “we time” as you soak up the area’s laid-back vibe—and its moderate climate.

Breathtaking Beverly Hills

Here in the land of swimming pools and movie stars, where fire hydrants are painted silver and even the local post office offers valet parking, it’s easy to lounge in the lap of luxury.

As soon as you enter the 90210 zip code, you’ll want to visit Rodeo Drive and Wilshire Boulevard, replete with all the world-class luxury labels you would expect: Prada, Gucci, Dior and many other favorites. If shopping isn’t in your plans (although we can’t imagine it wouldn’t be!), grab a street-side bistro table and enjoy a meal as you watch celebrities and fashion divas stroll by.

One of the prettiest spots in Beverly Hills is Villa Blanca (villablancarestaurant.com), a toney little restaurant owned by Lisa Vanderpump of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills fame. Vanderpump and her adorable two-pound Pomeranian, Giggy (also an international television star), regularly dine at Villa Blanca.

An interior designer by trade, Vanderpump infuses her sublime style in every element of the bistro, where monochromatic tones of white, cream and metallic are accented with oversized mercury-glass urns billowing with fresh flowers. Fans swear by Villa Blanca’s hearty pappardelle bolognese ragu, and you won’t want to leave without diving into the sticky-toffee bread pudding, topped with a scoop of silky vanilla ice cream.

Another A-list spot is Bouchon Bistro (bouchonbistro.com). Although it just opened in 2011, it’s already garnering rave reviews. Stop by Bouchon’s 10-seat Champagne Salon for a refreshing glass of bubbly. Then enjoy steak frites, bacon quiche, croque madame or a plate of fresh oysters in the outdoor garden.

After all your shopping, cocktailing and dining, you deserve a little pampering, so head for SPA 7 Aesthetics at the Simoni Plastic Surgery Center in Beverly Hills (spa7ca.com). This medical spa is known for innovative skin rejuvenation services such as diamond therapy micro-dermabrasion, body contouring, and the country’s very first micro-current filler facial—a no-needle, no-downtime treatment that plumps, hydrates, lifts and firms skin from within. SPA 7 treatments have been featured on The Doctors, The View and Entertainment Tonight. 

While the area offers a collection of fine hotels, a standout is the Peninsula Beverly Hills (peninsula.com/beverlyhills), which celebrated 20 years of service by unveiling renovated rooms and suites in 2011.

Tucked under a blanket of lush treetops as though it has been there forever, the Peninsula Beverly Hills offers finely appointed sleeping rooms that start at $575 nightly, as well as spacious 3,000-square-foot detached Garden Villa suites for $5,000 a night. Traditional but not stuffy, the hotel hits the spot for those who appreciate the finer things.

Fresh fruit, sweets and monogrammed pillow shams will welcome you to your room. Then treat yourself to the renowned Roof Garden and pool area, and reserve a cozy cabana if you plan to spend a day under the sun. Enjoy traditional afternoon tea (not to be missed!) just off the main lobby or power-dine at the in-house AAA Five-Diamond Belvedere restaurant. End your day by listening to live piano music in the plush Living Room, just off the main lobby.

If you’re in need of further relaxation, one of Beverly Hills’ premier retreats is only an elevator ride away from your room. The Peninsula Spa was voted number one for service and number two for treatments for U.S. urban spas by the readers of Conde Nast Traveler.

Hooray for Hollywood

If you’re a star-gazer, you must visit Grauman’s Chinese Theater, a world-famous throwback to Tinseltown’s Golden Age. Prepare to get a little weak in the knees as you rest your palms in the handprints of iconic celebrities whose autographs have been memorialized in cement. Next, stroll along the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and then hop in a van and see the stars’ homes in the Hollywood Hills or tour one of the big studios to relive memories of your favorite films. Sure, it’s touristy, but it’s also de rigueur when you’re in the movie-making capital of the world!

For the latest scoop on Hollywood events, visit seeing-stars.com and you’ll instantly learn about all the red-carpet premieres and Walk of Fame ceremonies. Soon you’ll be lining the streets along with all the other film fans.

The starstruck will also enjoy lunch at the Ivy (theivyla.com), a quintessential rendezvous for those in the entertainment industry. Then head over to Urth Caffé (urthcaffe.com), on Melrose Avenue, where dressed-down actors and producers grab coffees and talk show biz after hiking in Runyon Canyon. Another can’t-miss spot for celebrity sightings is the Grove, located at the original Farmers Market, where NBC’s Extra entertainment show shoots live each weekday.

At the corner of Hollywood and Vine, one of the most famous intersections in the world, you’ll find the new Wood and Vine restaurant and bar (woodandvine.com). Formerly home to the first offices of Charlie Chaplin and the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, this late-night hangout is just across from the always-packed Pantages Theatre.

Known for its extensive wine list and inventive menu, Wood and Vine offers indoor as well as alfresco dining, surrounded by soaring buildings. Start with an Accomplice (organic vodka, lemon juice, strawberry syrup and champagne), then select from a menu of too-good-to-be-true offerings. Silky chicken liver mousse, rich gnocchi, comforting chicken and waffles, and homemade salami and pepperoni are favorites among the regulars.

Another happening local spot is Sunset Boulevard’s Chateau Marmont, billed as “a fantastical folly in the land of make believe” and modeled after an infamous royal residence in France’s Loire Valley. Next door is Bar Marmont, perfect for a late-night martini, a “damn good burger” or savory lamb ragout.

If it’s your first trip to Los Angeles, you will quickly discover that getting around without a car can be challenging. For example, don’t expect to grab a cab right outside your Beverly Hills hotel and take off for an evening in neighboring Hollywood. You better order the taxi in advance and be prepared to pay an eyebrow-raising sum for round-trip transport.

If you’re game, just ask your concierge for a bus or subway schedule, but you’ll find that most tourists prefer to rent a car so that they can easily explore the city and surrounding must-see communities such as Santa Monica and Venice Beach. As they say, “Everyone drives in L.A.”

HOLLYWOOD INSIDER Styling Tips 

31 Bits jewelry is huge in L.A.

• Denise Weaver, president of Pistol & Stamen PR on Sunset Boulevard in West Hollywood, whose job is to know all the chicest people and coolest resources in town, shares a few of her best bets:
• When you’re ready for your close-up, visit one of the many salons that cater to local glitterati. Check out Galvin Benjamin (galvinbenjamin.com) in West Hollywood, the go-to salon for many a celeb.
• Shopping for upscale fashions and home furnishings? Walk along Melrose Avenue between La Cienega Boulevard and Doheny Drive, and don’t miss Melrose Place, a hidden gem of a street that boasts Carolina Herrera, Marc Jacobs, Alexander McQueen, Oscar de la Renta, Vera Wang and more.
• Weaver says that “one of the best things on the planet right now” is jewelry by 31 Bits. She reports that L.A. fashionistas are wearing these handmade lacquered paper necklaces and bracelets that are created by impoverished women of Uganda. A portion of the proceeds helps empower Ugandan women to become independent. This super-hot jewelry can be purchased at 31bits.com.

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GOOD EATS: Mark Kuzma stops in for a bite at Il Vecchio Cafe, part of Calandra’s Italian Village in Caldwell. He lives nearby and can smell the fresh bread baking throughout the day.

Why Live in Caldwell? It was an easy choice for me. I grew up here and have family and friends in the area. For me, Caldwell provides the benefits of living in a small town, with easy access to New York City. Caldwell’s incredible variety of food options is among New Jersey’s best-kept secrets!

What are some of your favorite local spots? Enjoying great food is one of my passions. Some of my favorite spots are Tony D’s Pizza, the best pan pizza I’ve had outside of Italy; Hog Wild BBQ; Casa Filipo; the legendary Cloverleaf Tavern, the best beer selection in North Jersey; and, of course, Calandra’s. I also spend a lot of quality time at Grover Cleveland Park enjoying outdoor activities.

Tell us about your work. I’m the owner and artistic director of Laboratory Hair Studio, a full-service salon in Morristown. I’m fortunate enough to work in an industry with creative and inspiring people. I challenge myself, as well as my team, every day to hone our craft and deliver exceptional services to our clientele. We take pride in our work and love helping enrich people’s lives by making them look and feel their best.

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Cupid’s quiver will strike your heart with these feminine and flirty baubles and boudoir accessories. A little glam goes a long way!

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Sapphire Soiree

The 10th anniversary of the Past, Present & Future Gala benefiting Integrity House’s Integrity Initiative for Women & Children was held at the Hilton Short Hills. The pre-event reception was hosted by Susan Walter at her Bernardsville home.

The Fabric of Our Lives

Creative Wallcoverings & Interiors in New Providence hosted a Night of Turkish Delights to benefit Susan G. Komen for the Cure. A special showing of million-dollar decorator Martyn Lawrence-Bullard’s exclusive Schumacher fabrics highlighted the event.

Wonder Women

The Boy Scouts of America’s annual Tribute to Women Award Luncheon honors women who live their lives according to the ideals of the scout oath and law, and serve as role models for New Jersey youth.

Links of Love

Tracy DiMarco, of Jerseylicious fame, joined the Di Modolo staff at the Mall at Short Hills to promote the company’s new Linked by Love silver collection. DiMarco mingled with shoppers and wrote personalized messages on jewelry pouches. A portion of the day’s proceeds went to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital.

Bangz Beauties

At The Face of Bangz event, Bangz Salon & Wellness Spa in Montclair searched for one person who best exemplifies inner and outer beauty. Winner Ella Crowe of Montclair received $1,500 in salon services and a $500 donation to her favorite charity, Hudson Perinatal Consortium. Raffle tickets and donations supported Crowe’s charity. Among the judges was Park Place editorial director Ken Schlager. 

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GOLD RUSH: Rather than take up room in your jewelry box, gold earrings, necklaces, rings and bracelets that are no longer worn can be exchanged for cash.

When throwing parties and get-togethers with friends, Christine Berkson of Chatham Township usually thinks outside the box. But for a fun girls’ cocktail party at her house, she instead focused her party-planning energies inside the box—the jewelry box, that is.

“I had some gold that I wanted to sell and I never felt comfortable walking into a jewelry store for fear that they wouldn’t give me the best deal,” she says. “I then realized that a friend from college was working for Golden Girls as the national sales director. She posted something on Facebook about having a gold party and I asked her about it.”

Golden Girls specializes in home-based gold parties staffed with professionally trained buyers of gold, silver and platinum. Though based in Atlanta, the company has representatives throughout the country who will come to your home.

Berkson, a stay-at-home mom with 9-year-old twins, had a feeling that her neighbors and friends might have similar unwanted gold jewelry lying around—those bad ’80s gold hoops better suited for Salt-n-Pepa, gifts from bygone boyfriends or even inherited pieces with no sentimental value. It’s these very items that can add up, since the price of gold is at an all-time high.

“Today’s gold price per troy ounce is approximately $1,574, but fluctuates daily,” says Amelia Courtney, the New Jersey–based Golden Girls representative who ran Berkson’s party. “The all-time high was reached last year at just under $1,900 per troy ounce.” The state of the economy is a good indication of gold prices. As the economy struggles and stays stagnant, gold investments increase and keep the value of gold strong, adds Courtney.

The ideal jewelry to sell are pieces that no longer hold value, such as single earrings, broken necklaces or out-of-date styles. “I traded in lots of old gold, mismatched earrings, broken necklaces, some banged-up gold bangle bracelets,” Berkson says. “Oh, and my mother-in-law’s silver! But don’t worry…she knew about it.”

Keep in mind that the majority of jewelry on the market (and in your jewelry box) is not purely refined gold. Fourteen karat is only 58.3 percent gold and 10 karat, only 41.3 percent, says Courtney. “So 14-karat gold is worth only 58.3 percent of market value at most.” Plated jewelry has no scrap value at all.

The gold theme was a hit with Berkson’s guests, mostly friends and neighbors in Chatham, who dined on fingerling potato cups, a trio of chilled soups in cordial glasses and a Nutella bombe dessert with gold-leaf accents from Ome Caterers in Whippany. Other yummy treats included gold-embellished cupcakes from the Pink Cake Box in Denville and easy-to-make St. Germain champagne cocktails, with a sparkling golden glow.

“They loved it because for once they were invited to a girl’s-night-out party that did not involve buying something they didn’t want or need—instead they went home with cash,” says Berkson. “They also liked the idea that Golden Girls contributed a portion of the proceeds to charity.” In fact, that was the evening’s silver—gold, really—lining: Golden Girls donates 2.5 percent of the value of the gold purchased at the party to the host’s charity of choice. ”The 2.5 percent is based on what Golden Girls grosses that evening, not from what the person donates,” Berkson says. With some parties grossing close to $10,000, this philanthropic contribution certainly adds up.  “I chose the American Red Cross in light of all the terrible natural disasters that have occurred over the past year,” she says.

The party was more successful than originally imagined. “While you would think that the most fun part of the evening was finding out how much your own gold and silver was worth,” Berkson says, “it was even more fun to see how excited and surprised my friends were after they sat down with their bag of junk jewelry that they estimated was worth $50 and walked away with a check for $300!”

For more information and details on throwing your own Golden Girls party, go to golddoesgood.com.

The Perfect Party Foods

For her gold-themed girls’-night-out party, Christine Berkson wanted to have fun hors d’oeuvres strategically placed around her kitchen—on the table, island and sitting-area cocktail table—so that guests could mingle, look at each other’s jewelry and munch at their leisure. The chilled soups in cordial glasses from Ome Caterers were not only pretty, but convenient to serve, along with the fingerling potato cups with caviar. Cupcakes from the Pink Cake Box were the perfect dessert item—finger friendly and irresistible. Ome’s Nutella bombe with gold leaf accents was also a hit. And don’t forget to serve a signature drink. In this case, the golden glow of a St-Germain champagne cocktail was the perfect choice. A snap to make and yummy to drink, these cocktails were flowing all night.

All That Glitters…  

• Amelia Courtney from Golden Girls offers these tips for selling your own gold:
• Only sell to a buyer or company that offers standard pricing per ounce.
• Be sure the buyer weighs and evaluates your gold in front of you.
• Don’t let the buyer mix disparate karats when weighing, as pricing differs for each.

• If you are at all uncomfortable or feel pressured, ask for your gold to be returned and select another buyer.
• Ask for recommendations. Many jewelers buy gold, so choose a store that you trust or ask friends for a recommended source.

 

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ROOM TO RELAX Plump cognac leather sofas offer ample seating in this family room, which opens to the kitchen. Guests can mingle with the cook without being underfoot. A fieldstone fireplace anchors the space and rustic touches, such as the custom mantel (fashioned from a vintage barn beam) and wrought iron chandelier, add warmth. Just beyond the great room— behind French doors, with transom windows for extra light— is a billiard room.

Ginny Zonfrilli knew that symmetry would be key to balancing the generous spaces of this 10,000-square-foot residence in Morris County. “The idea around this home was to create a place of comfort, with room for lots of guests,” says the principal of South Orange-based VHZ Design. A 30-year design veteran, Zonfrilli is a firm believer in balance and harmony in all of her projects. “I don’t have a signature style. I believe in giving clients a space that reflects them, a place they love to come home to,” she says.

Throughout the 5-year-old New Vernon residence, continuity in style and color palette create a cohesive, unpretentious look, while maintaining a stately posture. Architectural details—classic millwork, a fieldstone fireplace and hearth (that mirrors the chimney stonework)—add character, while the modern floor plan lends itself to entertaining.

For this on-the-go client, the home needed to provide space for friends and family to interact. Since the owner enjoys cooking (and previously worked in the restaurant business), a top-of-the-line kitchen was key. Along with all the culinary bells and whistles, Zonfrilli’s kitchen design incorporates a family room and billiard room that flow seamlessly. “The French doors that flank the fireplace offer an element of privacy to the game room, without completely cutting it off from the rest of the house,” says Zonfrilli. “It’s a great place for kids to hang out while parents mingle.”

Private spaces are equally well thought out, says the designer. In the master bath, his-and-hers dressing areas have handsome built-in cabinetry—hers with a sit-down dressing table, his with a pocket door that leads to the walk-in closet. “There’s a place for everything and it’s pleasingly symmetrical,” she says.

Zonfrilli began consulting on the home during its planning stages, though she wasn’t starting on the ground floor with this client. She had worked with him before, and also had designed several properties for his parents. “He’s a second-generation client.” Zonfrilli is currently renovating a beach house, located in Brick, for the homeowner.

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Sarah Wendell stole her first romance novel.

As a kid, poor eyesight had made learning to read difficult for Wendell. “I got it in my head that I wasn’t too smart,” she says. One day in high school, when she spotted her class valedictorian intently reading in the library, she wanted to know what thick paperback had her classmate so enraptured.

It was a romance novel.

When the valedictorian stepped away, Wendell seized the moment. “I started reading her book, then I checked it out of the library before she got out of the bathroom,” says Wendell.

She never talked to the valedictorian again, but that one innocent heist set Wendell on a career path. From her home in Montclair, Wendell, 36, runs Smart Bitches and Trashy Books, a website of reviews and criticism of romance novels.

Laugh all you want, but romance is serious stuff. Romantic fiction generates $1.36 billion in annual sales, according to the Romance Writers of America, and holds the largest share of the consumer book market.

Beyond Heaving Bosoms: The Smart Bitch’s Guide to Romance Novels, Wendell’s first book, published in 2009 with coauthor Candy Tan, has become required reading for courses at Princeton (Topics in American Literature: American Best Sellers) and DePaul University in Chicago (The Popular Romance Novel). Wendell also pens a column about romance every other week for Kirkus Reviews, an influential book review magazine and website. Her second book, Everything I Know About Love, I Learned from Romance Novels, was published in October.

“I take the romance genre very seriously, but I don’t take myself very seriously,” says Wendell, which is what makes Smart Bitches such a delight, even if you haven’t read a romance novel since you snuck glances at one you found in your grandmother’s beach bag. (The newer books are much better, more in line with the modern reader—no bodice ripping unless you go for a classic.)

Wendell grew up in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. After college, she moved to Jersey City with her husband, Adam (her high school sweetheart), so she could attend graduate school at Drew University and he could attend NYU Law school.

“I wanted to write a feminist literary criticism of a romance novel by Jude Deveraux [New York Times best-selling author of more than 35 historical romance books] but was told that was inappropriate,” she says. So she dropped out and worked in the Drew University graduate admissions office instead.

In 1997, she started writing an online personal journal. “This was before there were blogs and blogging software, so I had to hand code,” she says. What she wrote was a hodgepodge, everything from long rambling essays to recipes for cat food.

Thanks to the cat-food recipes, she met Candy Tan, who came across Wendell’s site while looking for remedies for her sick kitten. After months of e-mailing, the two started talking about their love of romance novels and how “we were both English majors who took a lot of crap for liking them. So we took the power of our English degrees and wrote about what we loved and didn’t love about romance novels,” says Wendell. And Smart Bitches was born.

Wendell thought it would be a lark. Her husband thought otherwise and told her this would be her career.

He was right. Wendell quit her job in 2010 to focus on the web operation. (Tan is now an attorney.) The site gets between 300,000 and 400,000 visits a month and has readers in 160 countries.

Wendell and her husband moved to Montclair when she was pregnant with their first son. He’s now 6, her youngest, 4. They chose Montclair because it reminded them of the quaint Pittsburgh neighborhood where they grew up.

“The houses are the same age and the same look, and there are sidewalks and trees,” she says. “It’s a town with places to go shopping. You’re right next to a big metropolis but you don’t actually have to go there unless you work there.”

Wendell runs the website, and writes, from home. She loves her job but admits that sometimes defending romance is an uphill battle. “There is a lot of wonder about some of those covers,” she says. “There are lots of mullets in romance land. Heroes unbutton their shirts but tuck them in!”

But, she also says the genre is unfairly maligned and quickly dismissed because it’s “a genre that is written by, produced, purchased and consumed only by women.”

Wendell explores the redeeming values of romance novels in Everything I Know about Love, I Learned from Romance Novels, which started as an advice column on the Smart Bitches website. The book points out the strengths of the novels beyond silly covers: They are stories about strong women, who make positive changes to their lives; the heroines find happily ever after and readers know this will happen when they pick up the book.

“If you’re going to be the heroine of your own life, you need to figure out the best way for you to be the person that makes you most happy,” Wendell says.  “You are in charge. It’s your story. Get off your butt and get going.”

Wendell doesn’t see the genre losing its appeal anytime soon, especially with a country stuck in a long, economic funk.

“I know happiness is not sexy,” she says. “It’s much more fashionable to be miserable. But happiness is something that everyone values, and happiness is priceless. Romances are all about that happily ever after, and it’s easy to mock it, even though that’s what people are really looking for.”

Romance: It’s not all fiction

1. Romance is about you, but it’s not all about you. You have to value someone else’s happiness as much as you value your own—and vice versa.

2. Romance means a commitment to routine care and maintenance. A happy relationship means not taking your mate for granted, or assuming that he knows what you’re thinking. Big misunderstandings are to be avoided at any cost.

3. Romance means loving someone for who he is right now. You should know that you are loved without any requests or demands for change. Any man who says he would love you more if you were thinner, or taller, or better looking is not a person worth spending much time with.

4. Romance means believing you are worthy of a happy ending—and it means wanting to give one to someone else.

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